Honjii's Harangues

Notes to the Donald and the Mittwit

To Donald Trump:  I will donate one million dollars to the charity of your choice if I may be allowed to pull whatever that thing on your head is to determine whether or not it is real hair and that you are not an alien from outer space.  You have until midnight of November 2 to accept my challenge.

To Mitt Romney:  You smile and tell us of great things you will do for this country, and I can’t help thinking I wouldn’t buy a used car from you.  I must admit, some of what  you say sounds great…BUT, I don’t believe you.  Just like that line from an old song, “Your story’s touching, but it sounds like a lie.”  Mitt, you tell us you know how to create jobs and you know how to fix the economy, but you’ve yet to outline how you intend to accomplish these things you supposedly know.  With so much hot air, I’m surprised your feet stay on the ground.  Does your magic mormon (deliberately not capitalized) underwear have pockets for lead weights?