She was driving and shaving what?

May 16, 2011 at 5:42 pm | Posted in humor, insanity, Miscellaneous, modern trends, strange news, stupidity | 4 Comments
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We all know the dangers of distracted driving, so let this story serve as a warning to those who engage in this activity while behind the wheel. (click the image to enlarge)

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Stuff that just came tumbling out of my head

January 30, 2011 at 1:10 pm | Posted in Beliefs, I'm just saying, Miscellaneous, random thoughts, Religion, social comment, stupidity | 4 Comments
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Not only do people sometimes make mountains out of molehills, they then try to force others to climb them..

Some congressional representatives would more be more aptly called representatives of rich corporate America.

Have you ever noticed that during a discussion, debate, argument…the higher the decibel level of someone’s voice is directionally proportionate to their level ignorance?

I saw a sign on a store saying they sold new and used antiques.  How is this possible?

I’ve heard of such religious organizations as Jews for Jesus and Cops for Christ.  I have some ideas for more:

  • Sluts for Salvation
  • Prostitutes for Prayer
  • Whores for Holiness
  • Criminals for Christianity
  • Rejects for Resurrection
  • Jerks for Jesus (In doing a search to see if any of these might exist I actually found a site for this one.)

I could probably think of a dozen or so more, but I really should stop now.

If the TSA (which may stand for Touch Some Ass) is going to get personal with us perhaps they should become a more kinder and gentler agency where the screeners are more like the wait staff at a trendy bistro, something like this:

Businesses are becoming as needy as people.  They all want you to like them on Facebook.

Speaking of Facebook, is this really about networking or a contest where whoever collects the most friends wins?

If you have 538 friends on Facebook does that make you feel like one of the popular kids in high school?  Does it boost your self esteem?  How many of them do you actually know?  How many have you even met?  And more importantly how many of them will help you move, drive you to the airport, or be willing to take your call at three AM when you need someone to talk to?  The answer to the last question is the real number of friends you have and I’m guessing it’s not in the triple digits and in most cases not even double.  Facebook has re-defined friend.

 

I’m just saying…

Woncha gimme a little…

November 21, 2010 at 10:19 pm | Posted in Miscellaneous, sex | 1 Comment
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…anatomical juxtaposition of two orbicularis oris muscles in a sate of contraction.

When I was in junior high school I learned the scientific definition of a kiss.  For some reason it popped into my head the other day and wondering if I had remembered it correctly I consulted google.  I nailed it, excuse me for a moment while I pat myself on the back.  In the course of my search I ran across the following, posted by Manju27.  I thought it was kind of sweet.

Prof. of Economics
Kiss is that thing for which the demand is aways higher than the supply.

Prof. of Accountancy
Kiss is a credit because it is profitable when returned.

Prof. of Algebra
Kiss is infinity because two divided by nothing.

Prof. of Geometry
Kiss is the shortest distance between two lips.

Prof. of Physics
Kiss is the contraction of mouth due to the expansion of the heart.

Prof. of Chemistry
Kiss is the reaction of the interaction between two hearts.

Prof. of Physiology
Kiss is the juxtaposition of two orbicularisoris muscles in the state of contraction.

Prof. of Dentistry
Kiss is infectious and antiseptic.

Prof. of Philosophy
Kiss is the persecution for the child, ecstasy for the youth and homage for the old.

Prof. of Comp.Science
What is a kiss? It seems to be an undefined variable!

Prof. of English
Kiss is a noun that is used as a conjunction, it is more common than proper, it is spoken in the plural and it is applicable to all.

Prof. of Architecture
Kiss is a process which builds a solid bond between the two dynamic objects.

more at http://www.citehr.com/91448-definition-kiss-prof.html#ixzz15z6A2XGW

Do you see the irony here?

September 13, 2010 at 12:22 pm | Posted in Consumer Issues, humor, irony, Miscellaneous | 1 Comment
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This display was on the front outside wall of a Home Depot.  Click the image for the full size pic so you can look more closely at the display and read the sign on lower left.  I thought the display and the promotional sign were either a new trend in ‘curb appeal’ or a contradiction caused by the ineptitude of  the staff members in charge of display.

First came the pod people

July 27, 2010 at 2:18 am | Posted in I'm just saying, Miscellaneous, modern trends, social comment | 4 Comments
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Let me preface my remarks by saying I am not a technophobe.  In fact I’m quite the opposite.  I do some Internet Technology consulting, among other things, to pay the bills and  I am the person friends and acquaintances call when they have problems with their computers or other electronic devices.

That being said, I do not own an i pod or other mp3 player, a smart phone, or any sort of electronic gaming device.  I generally keep my cell phones until they die and are so not cool that some people probably wonder what the hell that thing is.  I have a minimal monthly plan and rarely come close to using all of my minutes.  Few people I know even have my cell number and I use it only when necessary.  I don’t keep it within reach unless there is good reason to do so.

It seems electronic gadgetry is evolving faster than antibiotic resistant bacteria and new electronic devices are being introduced into the market almost as often as Firefox releases upgrades.

A few years ago I referred to them as the pod people.  The ones who couldn’t go anywhere without their i pods and at least one ear bud always in place while spending much time looking at the screen to get the right music mix.  If you were lucky enough to gain their attention, they might grudgingly remove one of their ear buds and impatiently  suffer through whatever verbal communication was being foisted upon them.   Add into the mix those folks always talking on their cell phones; in their cars, walking and talking while paying little attention to their toddlers wandering the parking lots, working out at the gym, in stores, banks, bathroom stalls…you name it.  What the hell, I wondered, was so important that these phones were practically permanently attached to their ears, and when not talking were always nearby should someone have a thought that must be instantly communicated.  Was I out of the loop, missing the boat on important breaking news or were people just wowed by the ability to be in constant communication.

Cell phones have come a long way.  You can use them to listen to music, check your email, surf the web, play games, pay bills, tweet, check or update your Facebook page, and most importantly NOT talk on them since they now make text messaging so very user-friendly.  Now with email, instant messaging, text messaging, Facebook, and Twitter we NEVER have to speak with anyone, ever.  If this keeps up we are likely to evolve without the capacity for speech, which is what separates us from other animals.

When I am out and about I see people with their phones, which are now called wireless devices, in their faces and they are utterly engrossed in either reading or texting what…I have no idea.  Apparently I have no life since I have no need to engage in these activities.  It occurs to me that, were I a criminal type, which I’m not, people so enamored with their wireless devices are completely distracted  and would be easy pickings.

Most people I know keep their phones close by.  If we are at dinner they are on the table.  They have to be; someone might text them and the world might end if they didn’t respond instantly.  I find it annoying and rude when trying to engage in conversation with someone and they have no compunction about interrupting whatever the topic, to instantly answer a text, or a call (more rare these days) as if national security depended upon it.  It is as if they have become a slave to their wireless devices, the way they constantly check them, even though they are never out of reach, lest they may have missed an important message.

I’m sorry but I just cannot allow my life to be dictated by a tiny computer.  I’m just saying…

On Vacation

May 3, 2010 at 6:27 pm | Posted in Atheism, Miscellaneous | 2 Comments
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Heading out of town for a week or two. I don’t know if I will go near a computer while I’m gone so please water the plants and get the mail for me until I return.

Guys, Be Careful Where You Point Those Things

March 2, 2010 at 11:58 pm | Posted in irony, Miscellaneous, News, strange news | 1 Comment
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The saying goes that for men the world is your urinal. C’mon you know you all do it and I think you love that it is so easy for you to pee anywhere you please, since you come equipped with a point and shoot model. Well you better be careful where you point it because a man literally peed himself to death after a car crash left him with only minor injuries.

Man urinated on live wire

MONTESANO (Washington) – AUTHORITIES believe a man was killed by accidentally urinating on a downed power line after a car crash.

Grays Harbour County sheriff’s Deputy Dave Pimentel told KXRO-AM radio on Monday that Roy Messenger was not seriously hurt after he collided with a power pole on Friday and called a relative to pull his car from a ditch.

However, family members found 50-year-old Messenger electrocuted when they arrived.

Mr Pimentel says Messenger apparently urinated into a roadside ditch but didn’t see the live wire. The urine stream likely served as a conductor, allowing the electricity to reach his body.

Mr Pimentel says there will be an autopsy but burn marks indicated the way the electricity travelled through Messenger’s body. — AP

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