Boob Jobs – Not Just for Fun Anymore

There’s a lot of gravity defying breast implants out there these days.  So much so that I think we now have a generation of males that wouldn’t know a natural breast if it hit them in the face.  At the gym there is hardly a natural breast to be found.

It’s become a right of passage for young women.  I overheard a conversation between two teenaged girls talking about when (not if) they would get their boobs done and debating about what size to get.  There was clearly some jealousy and competition involved.  When one girl said she would get a C the other opted for D.  When C girl then decided she would also go with a D, D promptly tried to talk her out of it, pointing out that she was slightly smaller (over-all) and a D wouldn’t be right for her smaller frame.  It was obvious from body language, tone of voice, facial expressions that C was not going to be out boobed by D and D wasn’t going to stand for equality.  I thought it would turn into a girl fight.  I’m glad to see that young girls are focused on what is truly important now that the economy is thriving, we’ve achieved world peace, and saved the planet.

Now it turns out that these ridiculous looking chest melons (OK a lot, not all) have protective properties (two cases described below and I imagine a search might turn up others).  My only hope now is that Texas Governor Rick Perry doesn’t get wind of this.  He stirred up a lot of controversy when he issued an executive order requiring sixth-grade girls to be vaccinated against the human papillomavirus, for their protection.   Next thing you know he will be requiring all pubescent Texas girls to get breast implants.  Well..the saying goes…everything’s bigger in Texas, even the idiots.

From the LA Times:

BOOSTER SHOTS: Oddities, musings and news from the
health world

Woman stabbed by husband is saved by breast implant, reports say

• October 07, 2011|By Amina Khan, Los Angeles Times / For the Booster Shots blog
  

  Plastic surgeon James Wells holds a saline implant, left, and a silicone… (Mark Boster / Los Angeles Times)

In another installment of our occasional series of breast implants meeting violent ends: A Russian woman stabbed by her husband was probably saved by one of her rather large breast implants.

The 40-year-old Moscow woman’s husband was allegedly aiming for the heart when he sunk a knife into her chest during a domestic dispute. But the knife was blocked by the silicone implants — which, somewhat ironically, her husband had requested she get some five years before.

In another incident a woman may have been saved from a bullet by her implants.

A Beverly Hills cosmetic surgeon says a woman’s size-D breast implants might have saved her life when a gunman opened fire at her office.

Lydia Carranza was working at the Simi Valley dental office July 1 when her co-worker, the gunman’s wife, was shot and killed.

Carranza was just a few feet away. She survived a gunshot to the chest, but the the bullet left a scar and deflated the implant.