Honjii’s Harangues

We’re gearing up for the next presidential primary.  I can hardly wait for all those fun television spots where each potential “winner” tells you all the bad things you ought to know about the other guy. 

To my way of thinking, campaigning for a political office is nothing more than applying for a job.  We, the voting, taxpaying public are the employer and the candidates are our prospective employees. 

Imagine applying for a job in the private sector using some of the candidates as role models.  I picture a reception area where two or three job seekers are nervously awaiting their turn to be interviewed for some coveted position within the company.  The intercom buzzes, after a brief conversation the secretary announces a name and ushers that person in to a plush office. It’s time for that all important face to face interview, where the person in charge of hiring will determine who among the applicants is best suited to fill the position.  I had always thought this is the time to put your best foot forward and convince the powers that be why they should hire you.  This is the time to tell Mr./Ms. Executive about your accomplishments, abilities, strengths, virtues, etc., in other words….show them what you can do…. make them understand why you are the best person for the job. 

Perhaps I’ve been operating under a misconception.  Rather than taking the approach I’ve just described, maybe the better way to go would not involve mentioning even ONE thing about myself or what I am able to do.  Instead I would launch into a diatribe about the other applicant still waiting to be interviewed.  I could point out how his ‘Rolex’ watch is actually a knockoff and his designer suit actually ‘fell off of a truck’ which calls his credibility into question.  I might also mention that in the elevator on the way up I gathered, from the end of the cell phone conversation I heard, that this man is cheating on his wife.  More proof he wouldn’t be the man for the job….and on and on and on…..you get the picture, don’t you? 

I am so tired of campaign ads, that if it weren’t for the “I’m John Doe and I approved this message”, I wouldn’t even know which candidate the spot is promoting.  The opposing candidate’s misdeeds are often the entire context of these spots.  During the last election, there were several ads in this genre that actually made me want to choose the candidate being bashed. 

What in the world makes these morons think that simply pointing out the shortcomings of their opponents would make me want to ‘hire’ them for a job as important as representing ME?  How, from this information, am I expected to know what you have done so far?  How will this give me any indication of how you might handle important decisions, or react to situations that might arise?  What it does tell me is that you have no ability whatsoever, and you are trying to cover that fact with a pretty damn lame diversionary tactic.  It also insures that you will NEVER get my vote because in your ‘job interview’ you have proved your incompetence and lack of character. 

. I hope more people pay attention to how our ‘job applicants’ behave between now and the election and don’t buy into the negativity.  Ask not what the candidate’s opponent did or didn’t do, ask instead, “What can you do, what will you do, and how will you do it?  And to the candidates I say, ENOUGH already!